Thursday, February 12, 2009

Broken Heart

The thing I hate most about parenting is when my child's heart is broken and there's not a darn thing I can do about it. I feel so helpless.
You carry your child for 40 weeks, at this point it is just between you, God, and your blessed child. No one one can share the moment with you when you feel your her move for the first time. You can just hug yourself and know that she is with you 24/7. After she was born I felt lost the first night, kind of empty knowing she was not in my tummy anymore, now I have to share her - what a blessing of motherhood.
When they learn to walk, they stumble and you're right there to pick them up and get them back on their feet again. When they start to learn to ride their bike and they fall , you're right there to pick them up give them a kiss, put a band aid on their boo boo and put them right back on that bike again.
When they start school you comfort the tears of fear. There is no better feeling then to have your child look up to you after a hug with a tear stained face and say see you after school. Then I leave crying.
Most of the time we can help to heal our children's pain with love, hugs, and maybe even a cookie. But today is different, this is a pain I can't make go away for my daughter - the break up of her first love. I have tears as I write this post knowing I can't make her feel any better. This is part of life - stupid boys anyway....just kidding.
After 14 months of dating the relationship was brought to an end last night, I'm hoping they will remain friends but who knows with teenagers. I am trying to be objective about the whole thing after all I am only hearing one side of the story. But it doesn't make it any easier when your daughter wakes you up at 12:30 a.m. to tell you she can't stop crying.
This was not a relationship that was going to lead to marriage. After all, she is only 15 and my husband and I knew this would not last forever. We were dreading this day actually. They couldn't go out on a date - just the two of them. They mainly watched movies and hung out at each others house, supported each other during their sporting events and talk/text for hours at a time. However, with all this in mind it doesn't stop the feelings of a 15 year old girl and her first love.
I'm sure today will be very hard for her at school. It makes me cry every time she texts me and tells me she can't stop crying. Don't think I am being cruel for making her go to school, she never asked to stay home.
I ask for prayers of strength and courage for her.
I also pray she will be able to stay focused at the swim conference that is being held tomorrow and Saturday. She is seeded to place very well and she wants to do better then she is seeded, but it will take a lot of prayer and focus to get her back into the right frame of mind. This conference is important to her because it will determine placement for state competition.
Between swim competition and Valentines day on Saturday - timing stinks....... life........
To Katie - just remember:
For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11
I love you Katie ! ! !


The Hatched Egg said...

May the Lord give you both the comfort in this time of pain. I know it is just as hard on you as it is her. But think of the blessing of how this is bringing you even closer.

Wishing you all the best,
Amy Furbee

Deidra said...

Not too long ago, when I was wrapped up (drowning?) in the emotion of the events in my own life, I felt God impressing these words on my heart: "I'm always getting you ready for the next thing." It reminded me, in the middle of the dark, that "All things work together for good, for those who love God and are called according to His purpose for them." It didn't take away the grief, but it did give me hope. Be blessed!

petrii said...

Oh how sad. First loves may be the hardest to get over. Bless her heart. But it sounds like she is busy, and I've found that it usually helps.

Thank you so much for visiting my blog. I look forward to getting to know you more.

Have a Blessed evening,

Jill (Sneaky Momma) said...

My heart goes out for your poor girl. Huge hugs and prayers being sent your way.



Naval Langa

Kwana said...

She has my prayers. You are a wonderful mom. I can learn a lot from you with dealing with my own teens.

Julie said...

Aw, that chokes me up a little too, and I don't even know her. I always tell people to me, being a mom is like ripping your beating heart out of your chest and letting it walk around on the street and have people stomp on it while you watch. (sorry if that was too graphic) I hope she's feeling better soon and comes out if it even stronger and more sure of herself.

Eudea-Mamia said...

Oh, how my heart aches for your daughter (and you).

When you're picked last for a team as a child, you think things cannot get any worse. Then you watch your child get picked last - can anything possibly hurt more than when you witness your child hurting?

Ugh. My mom should have warned me more. Darn her.

Hope the broken heart is feeling better. Espcically after not having that burger.

Welcome to SiTS!! Em

(I adore your blog header. Some words of comfort that I regretfully some times forget.)

Anonymous said...

I would say I'm so sorry that your daughter is going through this, but this is a part of life. What I really read here, that makes this more of a happy post to me, is the close relationship that you and your daughter enjoy. That your heart breaks for her and that you are not making light of her heartache. That she texts you and comes to you with all that she is feeling. This is the joy that I see in this situation. seems that you're getting this parenting thing right!
Oh and welcome to SITS!!!

lisalyn said...

I'm here from SITS and looking for Wenda, however, first I saw you are from Lincoln. My son is attending college there, so I guess I sort of felt a connection. :) Then I see you love the Lord...another connection. And now I read your post about your young daughters relationship breakup....another connection. :)
I do hope that your daughter is doing better and can realize that there IS someone better out there for her. God DOES have a plan.
My daughter was also going to marry her high school sweetheart, until the day after graduation he unexpectedly broke up with her. (they had dated 2 years) She is now 26 and has been in a couple other relationships, one leading to an engagement that was later broken. It's been VERY hard for her and she is still looking for that guy that will love her and spend his life with her. As her mom...I cry too, alot. It's hard to see your kids go through stuff like this. But I do love the verse you shared at the end of your post. It's one of my favorites that we claim!

The Dapper Darling said...

I have definitely had those days-weeks. :) This too shall pass mama always said!